Excuu-u-u-se me, but I'm among the millions (I hope) who foolishly thought that the Miss America pageant went to the grave some years ago when dear, old
Bert Parks checked out from The World.
Actually, it sputters on
in obscurity. And it even faces competition from the equally obscure
Miss USA contest. Both events have been attracting about as much attention as
ESPN's Stihl Timbersports log-sawing contests. That is, until the wily Donald Trump played the national media like so many 25 cent fiddles and turned his dreary little enterprise into headline "news" this week.
And you thought it was hard to sell the media on WMD!
Just when the President, congress, and the military are weighing
life and death decisions about the future course of Iraq, Trump makes a
grotesquely self-promotional ploy, pushes those dead mountain climbers right off the top of the news cycle, and foists the horrible, whimpering Tara Conner into our living rooms.
I frankly have no words to describe the
low-life, reprehensible, contemptible "news" executives who have turned their organs (and our eyeballs) over to Trump. Their punishment should be to spend the rest of eternity listening to an endless loop of Bert Parks singing "Here she comes, Miss America."
It's not like we're in a pre-Xmas news trough -- except for the black hole created by the media itself. Just as CNN was leading its newscast -- all day and night with Conner promising to go into rehab-- the, um, Pentagon released its quarterly report in Iraq basically admitting that things are
worse than ever (Can we get Rumsfeld and Bush into rehab with Tara?).
Anderson Cooper to Shana Moakler, 1995 Miss USA: "Do you think Donald Trump made the right call? Do you think he did the right thing in giving Ms. Conner a second chance?"
Keepin' 'em honest, as AC likes to say.
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December 20th, 2006 at 12:15 am
Wow, great Tara Connor pic, Marc. I completely forgot what I was going to say … something about the First Amendment and whether the military is protected by it, or maybe it was those subtle contradictions in Colin Powell’s recent statements about Iraq, or …. um, something.
Anyway, thanks for the fantastic coverage of … uh, this issue. Whatever it was. What *was* it, anyway? That Tara’s bikini bra cups should have looked more like mosque minarets about to be shelled by Iraqi insurgents? I’m totally confused. Oh, wait, I see: it’s about how the mass media sometimes falls into fits of tabloiditis, in the interests of making a buck. Stop the presses! This is unprecedented! Suggested headline: “We’re two-bit whores when it comes to pleasing you, our paying audience! Merry Christmas! Now go out and buy something, dammit, so our advertisers can keep paying US!”
December 20th, 2006 at 1:23 am
Turner, Turner, once again you fail to see what is right in front of your ogling eyes. Isn’t it obvious that by running a photo of a banner reading “USA” draped between two burgeoning mammaries, Marc is making a political and symbolic statement about the covetous, Mammon-like nature of American capitalist imperialism?
December 20th, 2006 at 2:51 am
Here’s something else the US press is allowing itself to be distracted from. Chris Hedges in Truthdig talks about the Israeli war on Gaza:
http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/20061218_worse_than_apartheid/
December 20th, 2006 at 5:54 am
Because I’ve been neglecting stories about the short-lived careers of beauty queens stories, I totally missed out on this major news break on April 10th: Miss Iraq stepped down after four days, after threats from extremist groups who called her “the queen of infidels”.
http://abcnews.go.com/International/story?id=1825659
They had to hold the pageant in Kenya. Or at a “heavily guarded Baghdad social club” — reports vary. Maybe by this time next year, beauty will be ascertained by female-only judges peeking under the contestants’ burkhas.
December 20th, 2006 at 6:44 am
I agree with everything Marc said. What’s next; coverage of wet t shirt contests?
Jon Stewart’s commentary about this last night was hilarious.
December 20th, 2006 at 8:07 am
But wait Marc, how come you havent taken on the very same media who have been following the rescue of the hikers from Mt Hood? Hours and hours of staring at snowy peaks and hovering helicopters is ok?
Surely this is also non news, compared to the very real and dynamic situation in Iraq.
Is it easier to pick on lil ole Miss USA instead?
December 20th, 2006 at 8:47 am
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December 20th, 2006 at 8:54 am
If you folks can’t see the direct connection between this story and Iraq – or more to the point, 9/11 – it’s because you’re not reading enough Dinesh D’Souza. The resident scholar at Hoover Institute explains it all in his forthcoming book, The Enemy At Home – The Cultural Left and It’s Responsibility for 9/11. It explains how “Islamic anti-Americanism is not merely a reaction to U.S. foreign policy but is also rooted in a revulsion against what Muslims perceive to be the…moral depravity of American popular culture.” Folks like Trump and Tara – and the media that loves them – are getting us killed. Because, you know, “they hate us for our freedom”…so, according to this leading light of the Hate America Right, D’Souza, the only way to resolve our problems with the Islamists is to become more like them.
Trump would obviously have better served American global interests if he’d have had Tara beheaded for her moral transgressions – especially the bit about kissing another girl – in Times Square.
Now THAT event would have garnered some unprecedented ratings for Anderson & Co.
December 20th, 2006 at 10:49 am
Marc — I can see where you’re right about the silliness of displacing “the important events” of today from headlines for naughty vixens …
But — dude, it’s X-mas! Please let us lesbians enjoy the mindless titillation in peace!!
I love that trailer-trash mama!
December 20th, 2006 at 11:09 am
Boy you people have no news sense!
The Goldmans are suing OJ again.
Judith Regan is suing Rupert for defamation and breach of contract over OJ!
And you’re worried about Iraq?
Boy are your students getting bad advice for the world of journanimalism they will enter Marc!
December 20th, 2006 at 11:09 am
And let us not forget the GLOBE says Laura is splittying from George over Condi!
December 20th, 2006 at 1:38 pm
Let’s trade. You give me Tara and keep the Donald. I’ll give you copies of the Iraq Commission Report and Kofi Annan’s farewell speech, and a GOP Congressman to be chosen later.
Oh. And you keep Kucinich.
December 20th, 2006 at 2:50 pm
Make love not war?
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What kind of boobs do they think we are?
December 20th, 2006 at 3:06 pm
I hope the irony of Tara being lectured to about “moral values” by, of all people, Donald Trump is not lost on anyone. I guess the fact that Donald Trump oversees the “moral” guidelines of the Miss USA pageant is a tribute to our culture. Other sick jokes: Samuel Alito and Antonin Scalia as “originalist” and “constitutional” judges, Dick Cheney as pointman of the current administration on energy policy, Mark Foley as the head of congressional committee on missing and exploited children, etc. etc. Like one big, long running bizaaro movie.
December 20th, 2006 at 4:43 pm
How about this for morality? Seven Espicopal churches in Virginia split off from their diocese to affiliate with the Archbishop of Nigeria because he opposes Gay Rights and backs that country’s laws making it a crime. No word yet on whether their congregations have inherited millions in frozen assets.
December 20th, 2006 at 6:40 pm
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December 20th, 2006 at 9:27 pm
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